I was talking with my friend, Faith, and she weighed on on the topic of guy’s behaviour towards women, and the underlying topic of women’s clothing. Having managed to escape the bottomless pit of blogging, she asked that I, instead, just post this up in response.

Jonathan, thank you for giving women a man’s view into clothing and lust. I admire the fact that you flee from lustful thoughts; that is truly a rare trait to find in a man today. I believe that both men and women can work together to allow the other to fight the battle of lust. It is my goal to pass on what the Bible, and the book “Every Young Women’s Battle”, has to say about modesty. I hope and pray that the godly womanly perspective I am sharing can be clear, effective, and will result in greater degrees of modesty.

We have all heard the saying, “don’t judge a book by its cover” and I believe that this saying can be applied to interactions with men and women. When one sees a book with a plain cover, it is our natural tendency to pay little to no attention to it. Where as, if one sees a book with flashy print and exciting colors, they give their entire attention to it, or at least until something better comes out. Although this is an innocent example, it can be applied to how men view women. I believe that a woman should dress attractively. That can include summer dresses as Amy pointed out, but with care that it does not leave a man lost in the outside appearance, not wanting to see what is inside.

The way a women dresses, is the way she will be treated. Men are very visual beings and women feel that, to catch a guy’s attention, they must dress in a way where the men long to see more. Godly men long to find women who will dress modestly out of respect for God and them. If a woman wants to be respected and sought after, she must learn to be a woman of sexual integrity. God’s word tells us to strive to be more like Christ, and that may mean dressing differently than this sex craved society.

Both men and women should strive to dress and act the way they want to be treated, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. If men refuse to feed into women’s desire for attention, women will in turn dress more modestly. But, we should not wait for men to change, rather we as women should search the Bible for guidance. Below is an excerpt from “Every Young Women’s Battle” which can help us evaluate/assess our motives in a particular outfit we desire to wear.

“Searching The Scriptures For Guidance”

Scripture is specific about what we should wear, but not on how we should dress. Below are some examples:

Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immortality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy. Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the sinful nature. ( Romans 13:13-14)

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience…And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. (Colossians 3:12,14)

All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another because “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” ( 1 Peter 5:5)

Although, you should not wear revealing clothes the scripture clearly says to clothe oneself with the above virtues.

How to assess the clothes I have or want to buy:

Blouses and Tops:

• If your blouse buttons up, is it so tight that someone sitting beside you might get a glimpse though the gaps between the buttons as you move around?
• If someone is standing over you or if you are bending over, could that person get an eyeful of cleavage?
• Are any of your tops so sheer that others can see the lace on your bra?
• Do any of your sleeveless shirts or tank tops reveal your bra straps or require that you not wear a bra?
• Do your shirts reveal any part of your abdomen or back if you do the “hallelujah test” (lift your hands above your head)?
• Do any of your shirts have sexually suggestive slogans (such as sexy or flirt)?

Jeans and Pants:

• Are any of your jeans so tight that someone could read the date on the dime in your pocket?
• Do you have to lie down on the bead and suck in your stomach to zip up any of your pants?
• Do any of your jeans ride your hips so low that your underwear can be seen from the back?
• Do you own any pants that have lettering or graphics across the seat to draw attention to your rear view?

Skirts/dresses and shorts:

• Do your skirts or shorts come above your thumbnail when your arms are at your side?
• Back up to a full-length mirror and then bend over to touch your toes. Are your private parts or panties on display in this position?
• Do any of your skirts ride excessively high above the knee when you are seated?
• When you are wearing a particular skirt, could someone sitting or standing in front of you catch a glimpse of your panties or upper thighs if you fail to keep your legs crossed?
• Regardless of the length of your skirts, do any have slits up the front, back, or side that could draw a guy’s eye too far up your legs?

Undergarments:

• If you choose to wear thong underwear, does the waistband show when you squat down or bend over?
• Do you have bras that you like to wear because you know the pretty straps will show when you wear certain tops.

Here is some additional scripture that applies to what virtues women should strive for:

• Proverbs 31


• Psalm 103


• Romans 13:14


• Matthew 22:39

In conclusion, a woman should honestly ask herself why she is wearing a particular outfit. Is she trying to catch the attention of a guy? If so, is she doing it in a godly manner? All men are visually sensitive to the appearance of women, but women should not take this as an excuse to wear clothes that are not honoring to God or their brothers in Christ.